At Last!

Proof!

guess who rolls in at lucky number 7 in this latest investigation by Laura Whately of 'which?', now I just need to wait and see what the outcome of the ruling is so that I can possibly get that pound of flesh returned to me.

This week's bajanism - Poppit

note:- This week's bajanism holds a special place in my heart, particularly because it's mere mention is enough to carry me back to days gone by when I would be jumping up and down on my parents' bed, only to hear my mother saying, "You! Wha you think you doin? get offa that bed ya poppit!!", therefore, I bring to you, this week's bajanism :- Poppit

Pronunciation: \ˈpä-pɪtˈ\

Function: noun

Etymology: Caribbean

Definition:

1: usually offensive : a person affected with extreme mental retardation
2 : a foolish or stupid person

how's that saying go about things in life and free, again??

doink

no, not that one. I mean the one that goes "nothing in this life is free"

A eulogy to celebrate the life and times of a dear friend - Swiss Banking

An untimely death, I'm sure he will be mourned by all.

God works in mysterious ways. Swiss Banking and I were sitting at Backo’s Pub just six months ago. We were having a few beers, which we did every Saturday afternoon together, talking about sports, politics and our lives. Then the subject of death came up.

As Swiss Banking normally did, he joked around about his own mortality. He said something that will stay in my mind for a long time. He said, you know what?, I probably won’t make it much longer. I’ve lived too much, too hard. The Team America World Police and their IRS will surely try to get me. Six months later, here we are, minus one. Swiss Banking gone from our lives suffocated by litigation. I still can’t believe he is gone.

I remember feeling so comfortable around him. I had never experienced that before with other friends. I felt like I could tell him anything, like he was the brother I never had. For the first time, there was a consistent figure in my life, which I could turn to for keeping my private affairs private.

To his family, Credit Suisse, ABN Amro, Bordier & Cie, and little Zurich Cantonal, I love you as if you were my own. In many ways you are. I want you to know that my family and I will be there for you in this difficult time. We will help ease the suffering that you are going through.

Swiss banking, I loved you. I'll miss you. Your family is in good hands. God bless.

*Built from a sample framework @ eulogyspeeches.net

And now,..............we wait

Aaaaah yes, so I entered myself in a kind of sweepstakes for the genographic project, if you haven't heard of it you should get involved. Not only because (in my opinion) it's a cracking piece of research that will (hopefully) expand Joe public's understanding of migratory patterns throughout the world, but, also because if you're like me and have an inexplicable attraction to debating after a few too many, you can tell certain people where to get off about your origins with a certain degree of scientific backing.

to be updated as events unfold.

Shiver me Timbers!!

So popularity in relation to this piracy thing seems to be snowballing, not that bad an option really, considering how the good ol' USA's subprime f*cked things up for everybody last year.

they've got;

• flexible working hours
• all inclusive cruise package
• job training available on site
• English skills are a bonus
• 100% invoice settlement rate

If only I could find them in the yellow pages, they might need a QS

*UPDATE*

hang on, forget piracy this thing is starting to take a very bond-esque turn

I think the owl's pretty much nailed it.....

As a self proclaimed "B-movie fanatic", I'm sure that I ( and anybody else for that matter, that's also seen; Dawn of the dead, return of the living dead (1, 2 & 3), dead alive, 28 days later, 28 weeks later, Shaun of the dead, the serpent & the rainbow and even scooby-doo on zombie island) could've told these folks for free that world domination would be imminent.

It does, however, further support my rationale to the government of barbados as to why I really, really have to purchase that AK-47 avec several bannana clips. Not to mention justification of my decision to be ready by purchasing a copy of this, as well as beefing up the garden tool stock here at the house of T.

Here we go again.............

Just when I thought the two salmon-tot retrievers at the house of T would keep them at bay, the monkeys have returned to my house.

Disturbingly so, whenever I utter the word monkey, people tend to associate them with adjectives such as cute, playful, funloving, jovial.

not me.

When I hear the word monkey I think the words thieving, vicious, useless, bastards pretty much sums it up correctly.

Take for instance, most people tend not to know that any attempts to chase away said green monkey by throwing any missiles e.g. 'bajan bullet' will result in the whole troop returning the favour plus VAT. These monkeys have also been known to attack small children for no apparent reason. Just this morning I was met at my car by one monkey who thought it was great fun to throw his leftover ackee seeds at my head.

So until I finally do come up with an effective method of getting rid of these bastards, the search is on.

The Lord of the rings: An allegory of the Ph.D

from the typings of dave pritchard:

"The story starts with Frodo: a young hobbit, quite bright, a bit dissatisfied with what he's learnt so far and with his mates back home who just seem to want to get jobs and settle down and drink beer. He's also very much in awe of his tutor and mentor, the very senior professor Gandalf, so when Gandalf suggests he take on a short project for him (carrying the Ring to Rivendell), he agrees.

Frodo very quickly encounters the shadowy forces of fear and despair which will haunt the rest of his journey and leave permanent scars on his psyche, but he also makes some useful friends. In particular, he spends an evening down at the pub with Aragorn, who has been wandering the world for many years as Gandalf's postdoc and becomes his adviser when Gandalf isn't around.

After Frodo has completed his first project, Gandalf (along with head of department Elrond) proposes that the work should be extended. He assembles a large research group, including visiting students Gimli and Legolas, the foreign postdoc Boromir, and several of Frodo's own friends from his undergraduate days. Frodo agrees to tackle this larger project, though he has mixed feelings about it. ("'I will take the Ring', he said, 'although I do not know the way.'")

Very rapidly, things go wrong. First, Gandalf disappears and has no more interaction with Frodo until everything is over. (Frodo assumes his supervisor is dead: in fact, he's simply found a more interesting topic and is working on that instead.) At his first international conference in Lorien, Frodo is cross-questioned terrifyingly by Galadriel, and betrayed by Boromir, who is anxious to get the credit for the work himself. Frodo cuts himself off from the rest of his team: from now on, he will only discuss his work with Sam, an old friend who doesn't really understand what it's all about, but in any case is prepared to give Frodo credit for being rather cleverer than he is. Then he sets out towards Mordor.

The last and darkest period of Frodo's journey clearly represents the writing-up stage, as he struggles towards Mount Doom (submission), finding his burden growing heavier and heavier yet more and more a part of himself; more and more terrified of failure; plagued by the figure of Gollum, the student who carried the Ring before him but never wrote up and still hangs around as a burnt-out, jealous shadow; talking less and less even to Sam. When he submits the Ring to the fire, it is in desperate confusion rather than with confidence, and for a while the world seems empty.

Eventually it is over: the Ring is gone, everyone congratulates him, and for a few days he can convince himself that his troubles are over. But there is one more obstacle to overcome: months later, back in the Shire, he must confront the external examiner Saruman, an old enemy of Gandalf, who seeks to humiliate and destroy his rival's protege. With the help of his friends and colleagues, Frodo passes through this ordeal, but discovers at the end that victory has no value left for him. While his friends return to settling down and finding jobs and starting families, Frodo remains in limbo; finally, along with Gandalf, Elrond and many others, he joins the brain drain across the Western ocean to the new land beyond."

O_o say what now.....?!?

I stumbled across this article on knife tricks' blog. I found it a bit strange at first (no, not the part about some twat born with a silver spoon in his mouth shooting off aboout how easy it was to setup shop in China, and how he's making a f*cking mint) that someone should be able to set up, so easily, a business in a country known for making people jump through all sorts of hoops just to obtain a tourist visa.

to be continued, I've lost my train of thought

Say "Howdy-doo!!" to Barbados' very own --------> L.A. Lewis

LOL that's all I can say to this one.

Sooo, During my stint in Jamaica i had the opportunity (nay, privilege) of laying my eyes on the absolutely worst graffiti I have ever known (you can view it here). While everyone in Jamaica knows of L.A. Lewis, no one there actually knows who he is, and so I dismissed him as just some urban legend. Later, we all found out that he was, in fact, a real person when jamaican reggae star 'Beenie man' apparently "thumped" him down at a public event.

As it turns out, L.A. Lewis is actually a Jamaican deportee who fancies himself to be a bit of a superstar *snigger*. Señor Lewis' marketing campaign consists of spraying his name on various landmarks far and wide across Jamaica that acknowledge how 'Great' his "fanbase" thinks he really is. (N.B. qoutation marks).

In somewhat of a similar event, and reported by our very own nation newspaper, our very own local version has also taken it upon himself to market his name on any open wall or floor within a 5-mile radius of Bridgetown, other uncanny similarities are the fact that señor 'off-da-brink' (Brink for short) thinks of himself as greater than Michael Jackson himself, also happens to be a deportee, and was inspired by none other than Tupac Shakur.

I suppose it's just a matter of time before we see pictures of him popping up with celebrities such as the queen, and Sean Combs.

more to come as this story unfolds.........

This week's Bajanism - Hifalootin'

hī-fə-ˈlü-t^ən

synonym: Pompous

Definition:
Commonly used among the older generation of barbadians to refer to an individual possessing an increased level of self-importance

–adjective

1.	Caribbean Slang. : Hifalootin' Jackass.

as sourced through M-W online

I can't put my finger on it...................

..but, where have I seen this before ?? ah! oh yes, now i remember.

The more I learn, the less I know....

So I remember being 12 years old and saying to myself, "Self, when i get out of this shithole, I'ma go to uni and I'ma get my degree" ,

fine, mission accomplished.

Then I said "Self, I really don't know as much as I should, I'ma go back to uni and do it again, but pay attention this time",

fair enough

then came "Self, I'm now more clueless than when I began this tumultuous voyage, what the hell ??!" and now have countless more questions than ever.

wtf, life, wtf.

more to come....

Cover your Children!!

yet another stunning example of *soon to be* generic freeware that leads me to believe that somewhere a geeky USMC private is stealing my thoughts.

Irony thy name is.........

London Met.


*update*

the londonpaper has gone out of print, so i suspect that might become a dead link soon. daily mail article here

Controversy? Why that's my middle name

So it turns out that my trip to the UK wasn't without controversy and true to form, was denied access to the main intended destination due to a few, shall we say, 'timing issues'. Anyway, I've got my slip of paper and that's what really counts......... .....f*ckers

Time once again for the "Interim valuation dance of death"

Good Lord, it's back again, somewhat like riding a bicycle backwards across a tightrope while trying to avoid a gauntlet of swinging axes.

*yeesh*

what in the hell?!?!

deepinnahearta SE China, trouble brews over increasing cases of internet addiction.

say what you want, but, I blame facebook.

sweet poetic justice

hang on, i think i've just spotted a ray of light today.....Lloyds TSB has reported a £4bn loss . I suppose they'll just recoup those losses by selling the flesh they carve from the backs of starving students.

...and why does that picture of an ass in a hole keep popping up like that?

most annoying day ever pt. 2

.......to further compound the issue of today, in a shock decision Lil' Kim has decided to free the 2 reporters that were sentenced to 12 years hard labour for illegally entering the country.

let me take a minute to get up on my soapbox here.........right, I'm not exactly the biggest fan of Kimilsungism, and I think that a 12 year sentence in a DPRK labour camp is pretty much a delayed death sentence, but, I do have a problem when a particularly difficult country, in a region particularly known for it's intolerance of wai guo ren that overstay their welcome, passes judgement only to rescind when the diplomatic brass steps in.

and people wonder why americans think they can do as they like without consequence.....idiots.

Most annoying day ever!

so i woke up this morning to the most cringe worthy news headline I've heard in sometime, turns out one of our neighbours thought it would be a good idea to rename the country's highest peak to (wait for it) .....................................Mount Obama,

*Ba-dump-bump-ching*